When The A-List: New York premiered in 2010 it earned nearly as much condemnation as praise – often from the very same sources. It seemed like most reality TV; infuriatingly watchable. Composed of equal parts oh-no-you-did-not drama and vapid navel-gazing, the show managed to become one of LogoTV’s highest rated original shows, right behind RuPaul’s Drag Race.

It may come as some surprise, then, to hear that a few members of the cast have managed to parley their time on the A-List into forces for good in their own lives, and the lives of others. Austin Armacost was certainly quick to let us know about that particular endeavour when we had a chance to interview him this past month. When asked what he had been doing since the cameras stopped rolling, the words nearly leapt from his throat.

"Only last summer the supreme court in the U.S. repealed the DOMA ... so, up until that point, I was working with a couple of organizations internationally because, as you probably know, my husband’s British, and we were unable to immigrate to the U.S. until that law was repealed," he said.

Fans of the show will recognize Armacost’s husband, Jake Lees, by reference. Since the series concluded, much of their time has been tied up in protracted battles with immigration, and doing advocacy work toward the recognition of same-sex marriage in the United States.

"After the show ended, and I was given this platform, I really wanted to do something with it," Armacost told us. "When I first got offered to do the show, I thought; this will be fun; a couple people will know my name and I’ll be able to walk into a gay bar and get a free martini. That was what I thought going into it. After season two, when it became a gay pop culture phenomenon in the United States, I thought, I can’t waste this opportunity. I really need to put it to good use."

Armacost certainly seems to have been busy. In addition to working with local Indiana organizations for marriage equality, he is also a strong supporter of the Wounded Warrior Project on behalf of his brother, a veteran who passed away due to a car accident while awaiting treatment from the U.S. Veterans’ Association.

As we talked activism Armacost became animated. One got the sense that the information he gave us was information he had become very accustomed to conveying in short order. Encouraged by the cascade of states whose rulings against marriage equality have been found unconstitutional, he said, "Now there’s been five states where same-sex couples have sued, citing the Supreme Court ruling [striking down DOMA] ... every same-sex couple that has sued the state ... has won. Before, it was not in the hands of federal judges, it was in the hands of conservative legislators. And so once it goes to somebody who puts their religious beliefs aside and just really focuses on what’s right in the world, then we gain success and equality."

Like many campaigners for marriage equality in the U.S. – and, evidently, judges – Armacost doesn’t put much stock in the arguments of the opposition.

"One of the things that baffles my mind the most is that the United States is founded on freedom of religion, and yet every state that tries to fight or ban gay marriage... use religion as the opposition. I just think to myself, religion is supposed to play no part in politics." We will see that Tony Perkins and Brian Brown get the memo.

For all that Armacost’s advocacy advances the cause of marriage equality as a whole, it seems that the source of his concern for the issue is his relationship with his husband, Jake. In fact, had DOMA lasted much longer, he relates, the couple may have had to try their luck across the pond. When the U.S. Supreme Court made its ruling, "[it] changed our lives... Dramatically is a complete understatement. We would have been stuck in England for years, had this all not been repealed. We had no other option. Now we’re both living and working legally in the United States, and it’s just amazing."

"At the time, [Jake] didn’t have any visit visa time to come to the U.S., and I was in a legal battle with United Kingdom immigration, and so we knew that there would be several months that we wouldn’t be together, and he was offered a job on a cruise ship, took the job for six months at sea, and the day that he stepped on the cruise ship was the day that DOMA was repealed. So it was definitely bittersweet. ... As soon as he got off the ship I flew over, we went to the embassy in London, we got a fiancé visa."

By now, dedicated A-List viewers will recall that Jake and Austin’s romance wasn’t exactly the stuff of tear-jerking romcoms. With accusations of infidelity and so much time spent apart in the early days, the relationship certainly did seem to be facing an uphill battle. It made us curious: with so many gay couples critically examining love, and fidelity, and finding ways of being together outside of traditional monogamy, did these two star-crossed young men ever end up making monogamy work?

"For us, monogamy has worked. We got together when he was 20 and I was 22, we got married a year and a half later. It was a very quick whirlwind of events, and living in two different countries and not being able to see one another... But now that we’ve panned all those problems out, it should be smooth sailing from here on out."

Armacost doesn’t seem to think highly of that most vaunted of gay relationship superpowers – the ability to play together (or separately) and stay together. Perhaps still an Indiana boy at heart, he told us, "I think two men who are truly in love and live together... there is no reason to have sex with anybody else. I think sex is a very intimate activity... It just doesn’t make any sense. ... It’s not that I disagree with it, I just don’t understand it. If you can honestly say that I love this person, but then go and make love to somebody else, that just baffles me. ... I don’t think it’s appropriate, but yet, my neighbour doesn’t think my gay relationship is appropriate. I try not to judge."

It has to be said: the whole conversation thus far – thoughtful and well-spoken – had seemed like a far cry from the impetuous and sometimes loudmouthed Austin Armacost we had seen on The A-List. We wondered, had the show gotten him all wrong?

"I was given ample opportunities to go and party and have fun. I think it was completely accurate at the time, but I think what a lot of people don’t realize is that I was 21 years old. Now, at 26, I’m a completely different person. People change – especially in your 20s. I didn’t know who I was at 21 years old. I was scared, I was figuring myself out ... Alcohol played a very big part in my life during filming."

"When you get sucked up into that lifestyle, you’re gonna turn into a bit of a hot mess, and I turned into a hot mess, and I’m okay with that."

It is an admirable stoicism, though we had to ask, was it hard having a younger, more hot-headed version of himself out there, representing him to the world? And would he be interested in a chance to set the record straight?

"From what I’ve heard, they’re trying to find a way to bring it back. If they brought it back, I would be excited at the fact that people could get to see the new me – the me that has evolved through time and trials and tribulations, and my relationship that now is on a good path. I would like to be able to show people this Austin, today at 26, but I’m not upset about it."

Though the original cast of The A-List: New York has drifted apart, Armacost confided that he still speaks quite often to his fellow A-listers, Reichen Lemkuhl and Derek Saathoff.

"I speak to Derek almost every day – we’re best friends. Reichen and I speak maybe once a week... Rodiney obviously not at all."

Armacost was circumspect when discussing his fellow cast members, with a notable exception.

"They did a great job casting us. All six characters – besides Rodiney, who is completely boring with no personality – all of us were eccentric and outgoing, and over-the-top and dramatic, and those are the types of people who, in reality, you either love or hate."

The burning question on our minds throughout the interview was: what was the point of the show? What did we, the audience, get out of our two seasons with the cast of The A-List? As the interview went on, it became progressively ruder to ask. Clearly Armacost is doing his best with what the show gave him, whether one feels inclined to consider it altruism or penance. Maybe there is no answer. Maybe that is okay.