Being a parent is the single most thankless, demanding, and unpredictable path anyone can commit to. Yet it is an expectation for most people on the planet, that one day they will grow up to birth, raise, and set examples to influence their moral upbringing.

But the model family from many years ago is evolving into something markedly different. The modern family spends less time eating together, being together and connecting with each other; the latter being the root cause of miscommunication surrounding larger concerns and expectations from parent to child and vice versa. As their children begin to grow into young adults, parents envision the life and path that they want (and often expect) for their children, often including marriage and having children of their own.

Teenagers feel the stress of adolescence (an experience that their parents have fought hard to forget) which include new responsibilities, peer pressure and school work, and of course the awkward onset of puberty.

But few parents expect their child to sit them down and discuss with them how they see their life differing from their carefully drawn out blueprint. Most have not even considered the possibility that their child may turn out to be gay, bisexual, or trans.

Several reactions commonly take place:

- Denial that their child is old enough, or otherwise has the capacity to know what their sexual attractions are.

- Dismissing what their child says, in favour of a theory that they are going through an immature phase and they will snap out of it in time.

- Becoming completely furious at the idea that their little boy/girl is different from what they expected, and feeling embarrassed or ashamed to face friends and family, usually resulting in a threat or actually kicking the child out of their home. (Statistically 30% of the homeless population in major cities are under the age of 18 and of these, a majority identify along the queer spectrum.)

- Admitting they already suspect their child may be gay and having prepared themselves for this possibility.

Some parents will grapple with one or more of these reactions. Some will be able to accept their child, and some will not.

The best way for any parent to cope and learn (of those who are willing to make the effort) is to find support with other parents and queer positive people who can help answer their many questions. One such opportunity coming up very shortly, is a seminar being hosted by the Women’s Health Resource Centre, called Your Child Just said that S/He is Gay – Now What?

The session will be taught by Jane Oxenbury, a registered psychologist, who has extensive work with families and queer youth. It will take place on September 24th from 7pm to 9pm at the Women’s Health Resource Centre located at 185, 1441 - 29th Street NW.

Call 403-944-2260 to register – it costs $35 dollars but early registration is only $25 (financial assistance is available on request).

Don’t let this important opportunity pass you by - it will mean the world to you and your kids.